Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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