Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
