U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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