Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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