At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
