I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
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