I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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