Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Randomize
