Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
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She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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