There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Randomize
