Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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