Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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