if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Randomize
