sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
