I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
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