Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize
