my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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