After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
