I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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