This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
