ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
