so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize
