my vag is so smooth its legendary
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
