So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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