I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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