This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
