What a fucking waste of an outfit
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
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