great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I enjoy the company of your penis
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
