She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
