Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
