Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
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