Her vagina should come with caution tape.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
