Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
