i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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