You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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