You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
