somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I think weed is turning my hair brown
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
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