I would go down on you faster than GM stock
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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