i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize