It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
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