I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
