Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize
