i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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