so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
