how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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