My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I am spending my child support on dildos
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Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
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Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
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