If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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