You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Is this like a preordered booty call?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
