I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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