I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
