would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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