im drinking this country out of the recession.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
